New Year

It's one week into 2013, and I believe this will be an amazing year!!  I spent New Year's Eve with some of the most important people in my life.  Marcus, his "stable of whores" (my roommate, both of the Saras, and myself), and 2 of my dear fraternity brothers.  Of course one is my guy friend that is going through a rough time after a break up.  I worry that he's filling that void with me.  He ended up staying the night in my room with me.  Though there was no sex, there could have been.  I don't want that.  I feel that would ruin our friendship.  If I had been less drunk, I would've told his sober ass to go home, but an intoxicated SL needs someone to sleep with her.  To hold her, kiss her, and help her fall asleep.

Of course the next day was spent with my family for my grandpa's birthday.  It's tradition for our family to go down to my grandparents' house on the 1st.  We played games, talked, and ate the BEST homecooked meal in the world (Roast, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, salad, and cole slaw).  I love my family so so much!  They really care about each of us, and we can be honest with each other.

The rest of the week has been filled with work, a sense of pride in our home (cleaning), and just overall happiness.  I've been searching my feelings lately.  I've tried to figure out where I am and what I want.  I know my first love still has a hold on my heart, but so does the only ex that could ever take his place.  He keeps trying to be my friend, and I think I've decided that I'd rather have him in my life in some fashion than lose him altogether like my first love. Then there's the ex that won't leave me be.  He texted me this week and said he'd never give up on me.  I think me telling him that he was wasting his time made a bit of an impact.  I'm hoping that was enough for him to leave me be.

Lastly, I have the most amazing guy in my life right now.  Someone I met through online dating that became my friend instead of something more.  Well, after a few months of being friends, flirting here and there, and talking to each other about the people we'd been seeing or talking to I think we're at that point of needing each other for more than just friendship.  I've started to develop feelings for him that I didn't think I would have.  I worry with him being farther away that a real relationship won't be in the cards for us.  I guess it'll be something we find out.  I know he cares about me.  He's always told me how awesome I am.  And when I see him smile, it makes me smile too.  He likes me for who I am.  We have a lot in common, but not everything.  And we care about each other equally.  I don't know what's going to happen, but I'm glad to have someone in my life that cares about me and talks to me everyday without the commitment of a relationship, emotional or physical.

Well, I think that's all I have for today.  I'm ready to see what new things this year has in store.  Good luck to the rest of you out there in the new year! Let 2013 be the best one yet!